The first day I was at post, we went to see my house. Post visit is already an emotional time for stagiers, because it’s the first time we see the reality of service here – it’s not all like summer camp. I wasn’t expecting much from my house – a cement floor, a faucet outside, maybe a ceiling if I was lucky – but I wasn’t ready to walk into the building that I’ll live in in a month.
The place is completely unfinished, with dirt and rubble on the floors, no bathroom or latrine, and a 3-foot gap between where the roof ends and the wall begins. I walked in and immediately felt like crying: no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t picture myself living there happily.
It took a day of thinking and forced positive thinking to get out of that little slump, but now I’m feeling better about the whole thing. Seeing the house made me realize what a struggle it’s going to be to set up an entirely new post on about $300 (that includes buying furniture, which is expensive), and beyond that, how hard I’m going to have to work to stick out the first couple of months. Because without Americans around to vent to all the time, it’s going to be pretty lonely, and I now realize what a big accomplishment staying for all 27 months would be.
After my day of list-making and processing (best feel-better list: Ways to Make My House Happy for Cheap), I feel much better. I went back to the house and took my directeur with me, and we talked about what needs to happen before I move in. He was telling me that they actually have some pretty cool plans for the house – a tiled bathroom, even – so if they actually manage to do everything in a month, I’ll have a pretty solid starting point.
3 comments:
come in lissa with your style and fashion ideals you will have it looking like a show place that everyone there will be visiting you to see it all. lol Just let us know here what you can use. I'm sending some bright material in your next package to spruce it up some. keep blogging!micantmi
perfect! i was planning on mailing you a proof-print or 2 from my senior exhibition - some artwork on the wall be surely spruce it up!
oh lissa! :) you always love making lists when you're upset. but it's ok i do the same thing ;P and in your next letter or whatever, give me/us a list so we can get you some pretty things! I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH!
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